Self Care Saturday: Manage Your Relationships…All of them

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Have you ever been in a relationship (romantic or platonic), where you felt you were the only one that put forth an effort?  Maybe you felt like you and the other person outgrew the relationship. Now you are reflecting on what went “wrong” and told yourself, “if I get into another relationship I will never do to someone else.  We have all been there.  We enter into new relationships with good intentions, then time goes by and it seems like those new relationships are headed in the same direction as the previous ones.  I hate to say it, but it just might be headed in that direction.  Subconsciously you are sabotaging the relationship and you may not even know it.  Maybe you keep backing out on dates or meetups because you feel vulnerable; maybe you are not supportive to others because you have never experienced a true relationship where people were genuinely there for you without expecting anything in return. In order for that not to happen you have to take ownership on where the previous relationships went wrong.  You also have to realize that not everyone is out to hurt you.  You may need to see a therapist to work through some things before you enter into a new relationship.  Whatever the case may be, if you feel the relationship is worth it, put in the work to keep it.  All types of relationships have a certain amount of work that is needed for it to stay alive.  If it is a romantic relationship, keep dating, communicating and learning about each other.  If it is a friendship, make sure you are on the same page when it comes to expectations of the friendship and what type of friends you are going to be.  Believe it or not, acquaintanceship is a form of relationship as well.  Make it known what your expectations are in that type of relationship too.  In order to break the cycle of failed or inconsistent relationships you have to be honest with yourself and the people in the relationship with you.

Truth is everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for. ~Mr. Bob Marley

*Remember, we all have the ability to speak life. ~SheSpeakz*

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